Yes, you read that correctly.  I think I am now officially stalking a Medium.  But, "stalking" has such a negative connotation.  It more feels like when you are dating someone you REALLY like and you want to talk and text with them all day long but you know you can't because you will scare them away, so you play hard to get.  Thing is, with the date, playing hard to get works because there is something he wants.  Playing hard to get with a Medium doesn't work because you have nothing they want.  There is no book (ala, "The Rules") about how to play this game.  It's just when you want something so bad, you feel like there is a set of guidelines you should be following in order to get it.  Only in the last 10 weeks have I realized that it doesn't matter how you play the big game of life, you only win if you are lucky.  You can do everything right and you still might lose.  But, I digress.  I was talking about this poor Medium I am stalking.  I wrote about her before.  She gave me a reading a few weekends ago and everything she said was right. DETAILS.  She literally knew details of conversations that I had with Beth and Ted from that same weekend, she knew details about my family, she knew stuff I haven't even told anyone.  When we got off the phone, she told me to keep in touch, and well, I have.  I may not text back my best friends, but I text the Medium all of the time.  Problem is, the Medium has four kids, including a four month old. She also has a job....as a Medium.  So, she can't just sit around texting and chatting with me all day.  But every time we communicate, she has new insight, she reveals new ways for me to connect with Maxie.  And since every day I sink deeper and deeper into this terrible depression, I feel like I need her!  Sometimes she texts back though and sometimes she doesn't (that is why it reminds me of dating.  Ted was and sometimes still is notorious for playing a good game of "hard to get").  I literally spent 20 minutes on the phone with my mom this morning dissecting for her the sequence of our last texts.  It went something like this:
Me: Hi [insert Medium's name], any chance you have heard anything from Maxie?
Me (2 hours later): I am so sorry if I am bothering you but I am so sad and thought maybe you would have heard from Maxie.
Medium (Next morning): Oh!  Sorry.  I left my phone at the office and I didn't see it all weekend.  I am charging it now.
Me (1 second later): No worries!  Have you heard from Maxie?
Me (an hour later): I am sorry.  I am just so desperate.
Medium (2 hours later): Sorry, am working :)
Ay Caramba.   Keep in mind.  She has done all of this for me without a charge.  She is a friend of a friend of a friend and she is just a lovely person and a mom who knows that I am in pain.  So, I am not at all complaining.  I just need to figure out what I might have that she could want so that I can keep her as part of my healing team.  Perhaps I could pay her a monthly retainer to return all texts?
I wish I had been born a Medium.  She actually wrote a book about how to be a Medium and the friend of a friend (who I now consider to be my friend) lent it to me.  I am reading it.  If I become a Medium, I can be a stay at home mom to the children I plan on having some day.  You can call me up and I will charge a reasonable rate to talk to your dearly departed loved ones.  It will feel good because I will be helping people to heal and I'd also be making a difference in the world.  Most importantly though, I would be able to stop stalking the Medium because I would be one!  I would be able to talk to Max on my own and I would get back real answers.  He could tell me what Heaven is like.  I could tell him to wait for me.  I could ask him why he left me and if and when exactly he is coming back.  He could tell me who else is up there, maybe there are people up there that I didn't know that well that are actually really cool. I could tell him how much I love him and miss him.
So, here's the update.  As soon as I started writing this post, my phone started "blowing up".  Her ears must have been burning.  If you don't believe in Mediums, I don't want to hear about it.  If you do and you want me to give you the contact information for "my" Medium, let me know...because I am thinking - perhaps if I start referring lots of business to her, she will be even more likely to text me right back.  You never know (but she probably does).